


John's Confession

by eliza_hpw



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Beta Wanted, Idiots in Love, M/M, No Beta, Sherlock had no idea, reinbach falls never happened
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-10
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-04-23 14:13:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14334201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eliza_hpw/pseuds/eliza_hpw
Summary: John is fed up. He is going to admit his feelings to Sherlock if it kills him. Reinbach falls never happened, Moriarty was killed by Mycroft in his spare time.





	1. "Sherlock Holmes I love you."

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Sherlock (if i did Johnlock would have already have happened) the TV show is owned by BBC and is based off the works of Sir Author Conan Doyle. This is my first fanfiction that I have ever written so please don't judge. If you don't like don't read.  
> Chapter 1 re-edited 1-10-19  
> I NEED A BETA!!!!!! SEND HELP NOW!!!! I AM THE CAPTAIN OF THIS SHIP, IM GOING DOWN WITH IT! 
> 
> just leave a note in the comments and I’ll provide information from there, thanks  
>  -Eliza

Chapter 1

7:30 a.m.  
John’s P.O.V.

Lying in bed alone, that’s when John felt loneliest. He would often hear the man he loved ever so dearly, but secretly, moving about, playing the violin or messing with dangerous chemicals. This is when he thought about Sherlock.

John had been debating his feelings since they first met in the morgue. At this point he could no longer keep his feelings to himself, John no longer cared. At one time he did care, he was insecure and miserable, not wanting to lose their wonderful friendship, willing to suffer if that meant Sherlock Holmes was his friend and by his side every day. That was years ago, now he knows that he is in love with Sherlock and if John doesn’t tell Sherlock, he will explode. His mind was set, John was going to tell Sherlock how he felt, even if that meant he would be kicked out of Baker Street.

John sat up from his bed, not bothering to change into actual clothing, sweat pants and a thin jumper was decent enough. Padding quietly across the room, the small hedgehog-like man walk from his bed to the door. He paused ever so shortly, questioning his decision before opening up the door. 

Moving down the stairs to the sitting room from, with his decision in mind. John was nervous, but determined.  Sherlock was already awake (John was unsure if he even went to bed last night), the self-proclaimed sociopath (not that John believes him anymore) was sitting on a wooden chair at the kitchen table peering into his microscope, looking at a slide completely unaware that John had walked downstairs. “Good morning, Sherlock.” John said as an announcement of his existence, as he was moving across the sitting room to the entrance of the kitchen. Sherlock looked up at, black curls (gorgeous in John’s opinion) falling in front of his face as he did so. John who is now standing in the door-frame of the kitchen received the response  “Hello John” mumbled, then is again ignored as the consulting detective looks back into his microscope. *And this is the man I’ve chosen to fall in love with* John thinks as he moves into the kitchen to make some tea.

John of course loves Sherlock with his whole heart, but even people you love can hurt you or make you upset. This pain (despite how small) then made John do the one thing he can do absent-minded, make tea.

As John is preparing the tea he builds his confidence and decides to talk to Sherlock as soon as the tea is done. Putting the kettle on the stove with enough hot water for just two cups of tea. As he is waiting on the water to boil he starts to look at Sherlock's face. His high cheek bones that John has often found himself gazing at at, those cupid bow lips that John would kiss all day if he were allowed, ans because Sherlock is looking into his microscope John can't see the crystal blue eyes he wouldn't mind staring into forever, forever lost, but eternally happy.

The tea kettle whistles, bringing John out of his trance and he turns back to the stove to take the kettle off. Quickly grabbing two mugs that he forgot to grab while the water was boiling John pours water into both mugs. As he is rummaging through the cupboards he starts wondering where Sherlock put the tea bags this time. Finally finding the tea bags John grabs two bags putting one in each cup. Then he grabs the sugar and milk (he bought the milk yesterday and is quite surprised that it is still here today) and places both on the table so that they can both use them once he is seated. As the tea bags are done he pulls them out of the cups and places them in the rubbish bin. Grabbing both mugs he sits down across from Sherlock setting one mug down in one of the few clear spots on the table that is not taken up by experiments news papers or slides with strange looking smudges that he can only hope that they don’t contain poison.

"Sherlock I'm not going to make you eat this morning, but at least drink your tea, I made it for you." Sherlock looks up from his microscope to look at John and he replies "And I am eternally grateful for you Doctor Watson for keeping me alive all these years by feeding me a constant diet of tea and toast and jam." his voice dripping with sarcasm. Despite the snarky comment Sherlock grabs his tea adding sugar and take a few sips because John is watching and he doesn't want to worry his blogger and then returns to his microscope taking sips every few minuets. As Sherlock does this John picks up one of the many newspapers in search for a case that might interest Sherlock.

"Sherlock, how about this one, it says here that-" "Boring I've already looked at all of the newspapers on the table, so don't bother." Sherlock interrupts without looking up. Not wanting to aggravate Sherlock before he can even discuss the real important topic. John finishes up his tea while looking through his email on his computer to see if he has missed anything important while he was asleep (he didn't).

Once he finished his tea he realizes that it is now or never to speak to Sherlock. “Um… Sherlock I want to talk to you about something serious, and I need all of your attention.” John says lightly to the man sitting across from him. Sherlock noticing John’s tone looks up and looks directly in John's eyes. John surprised at his obedience pauses, takes a deep breath and starts “Sherlock you are not allowed to interrupt me or overreact while I am speaking, so just listen. You are my best friend and have been for three years and we do everything together and I know everything about your personality. Your body parts in the fridge and your violin at 3 a.m. and your rapid fast, very rude deductions just to make me laugh while we get lunch at Angelo's. And I love you for it all, and people say that you have no heart and won't ever love me back, but you show me your heart all the time. We will be chasing a criminal across London, but if I fall behind you slow down enough that we can run together and if I get hurt afterwards you will sit with me while I get cleaned up or fixed, and your violin that calms me down after a nightmare. And now if it is not obvious at this point, Sherlock Holmes I love you and I want to be your boyfriend or lover or what ever title you want, I'll be that for you." After he says all he wants to John breathes out a sigh of relief and Sherlock sits absolutely still, processing what John just admitted to him.


	2. "I can’t imagine my life without you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating, new updates starting 1-10-19.  
> Beta still needed.  
> Chapter updated 1-10-19

Chapter 2

7:20 a.m. that same morning  
Sherlock’s P.O.V.

Sherlock had yet again not slept again last night, he stayed up looking at the different types of poison from previous cases comparing their slides, appearances, uses, forms and which criminal used them storing them for later use and to put them on his website later. As he hears John start to move around upstairs as he wakes up, Sherlock switches the slide under his microscope to a simple chloroform slide, so he wouldn’t have to pay much attention to it.  
Immediately noticing out of the corner of his eye while pretending to be completely immersed in his microscope (like a simple magnifying device could ever be more important than his John) the handsome man that he calls his best friend as he enters the sitting room walking toward him, almost not noticing when John says, “Good morning Sherlock.” And he quickly mumbles “Hello John.” in response.

John then moves to the stove to make some tea and Sherlock can look at John, getting a nice view of Johns arse in his pajama bottoms, that he had purposely let shrink slightly when he was doing the laundry. And as soon as John gets the kettle on the oven he turns around and looks at Sherlock, but he caught on fast enough and goes back to looking into his microscope and looking at John out of the corner of his eyes. Sherlock is worried though, because one day John will find out and he will lose his best friend, so he never tells anyone (not even Mycroft knows).

Hearing the tea-kettle go off Sherlock decides this is a good time to move a few things quietly, so their tea will have enough room on the table, and then he switches his slide to some sulfur dioxide. Once he is looking at the new slide John sets down milk and sugar and milk for their tea.

Sherlock is looking carefully at his new slide, because he is convinced that the sulfur dioxide has another chemical mixed in with it, but his studying is interrupted when John who is now sitting down at the table, which he did not notice says "Sherlock I'm not going to make you eat this morning, but at least drink your tea, I made it for you." Looking up from his microscope Sherlock replies “And I am eternally grateful for you Doctor Watson for keeping me alive all these years by feeding me a constant diet of tea and toast and jam” sarcasm thick in his voice, so John doesn’t notice the joy he feels that someone cares enough about him to make him something, and this person he also loves. Being grateful for the tea Sherlock takes a few sips to show his appreciation to John and so that his doctor will not worry and start fussing (not that he wouldn’t mind).

Dismissing his thoughts about John, he went back to looking through the lens of his microscope at the poison, for any trace of any possible other element, still randomly drinking his tea (he thinks John has gotten him addicted to it).

Not finding anything on the slides Sherlock looks up at John, who is looking at a newspaper, immediately recognizing the paper and knowing that the case that John is looking at is barely a 4 and hopes that he won’t be forced to take it. Sherlock decides to look back down at his microscope, because a few seconds later John starts talking, "Sherlock, how about this one, it says here that-" "Boring I've already looked at all of the newspapers on the table, so don't bother." Not really wanting to be rude, but he dose not need the information in his mind palace twice.

Deciding that he was done looking at the slides Sherlock pretends to look in his microscope, while he thinks about his John and how they met, making sure not to get too lost in his thoughts, so if John might need him again he could respond within enough time to seem like he was not in his mind palace.

“Um… Sherlock I want to talk to you about something serious, and I need all of your attention.” John says lightly, catching his attention, Sherlock notices this to be the tone that means John is going to say something that he finds important and Sherlock looks up immediately, and directly into John eyes, so his amazing, blond-haired blogger knows that he is listening, and John has his complete attention.

John takes a deep breath, and then starts with the speech that would change his life forever, “Sherlock you are not allowed to interrupt me or overreact while I am speaking, so just listen.” That was surprising to Sherlock because John usually lets him interrupt or interject, so this must be impertinent. “You are my best friend and have been for three years and we do everything together and I know everything about your personality. Your body parts in the fridge and your violin at 3 a.m. and your rapid fast very rude deductions just to make me laugh while we get lunch at Angelo's. And I love you for it all, and people say that you have no heart and won't ever love me back, but you show me your heart all the time. We will be chasing a criminal across London, but if I fall behind you slow down enough that we can run together and if I get hurt afterwards you will sit with me while I get cleaned up or fixed, and your violin that calms me down after a nightmare. And now if it is not obvious at this point, Sherlock Holmes I love you and I want to be your boyfriend or lover or whatever title you want, I'll be that for you."

Sherlock was shocked, processing every word that John just said to him, and shouted and jumped up and down, but then he noticed that that was all in his mind, and immediately tried to think of anything to say, and the only thing he could produce was “John…” which was said very soft. “I understand if you don’t want me here, and I can pack and leave now if you’d like.” As this is being said, John stands up from his chair and turns to leave, but this is when Sherlock reacts, and quickly grabs John’s wrist lightly. “John, you will never have to leave ever, I can’t imagine my life without you.” As he says this Sherlock realizes that he needs something big to get his point across, so he does the one thing he has been dreaming of doing since the first time he saw John at Bart’s. Grabbing John’s other wrist, Sherlock pulls John close to him, drops his wrists, placing his hands on either side of   
John’s face and kisses John softly.

John’s P.O.V.

John was shocked when Sherlock kissed him, and didn’t react immediately, but after regaining his senses, he kissed Sherlock back with all his emotions that he has been bottling up for three years. Desperate, lovingly, and longing, but it seems to end all too soon for John, but he immediately looked directly back into Sherlock's eyes.


	3. "Will we just be friends, will we try for more?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait on the new chapter, my finals kinda stressed me out and I got busy, so as an apology I've added an extra bit at the end that is not canon to the story. Thanks to Else for the comment and thanks to  
> bobbyelee, Kenshinsgirl84, Rose65, PtiteMac, Twinkle_patrick_star, 221bsweetheart, FanFictFreak, and Floatingturtle48 and the 10 guests for kudos!
> 
> Beta? No? Ok, imma just die with my ship, bye the like 2 of you who read this fic.  
> Updated 1-10-19

Chapter 3

John’s P.O.V.

Literally 5 seconds after chapter 2

“Wow, so you really do like me.” John said slightly in shock because of the turn of events. Carefully sitting back down at the table, knowing that this conversation would be of utmost importance.

“Sherlock, before we start this talk of our relationship, there is something I would need to tell you. It is common knowledge that I have been proclaimed ‘not gay’, but this is for all in good reason. When I was about 15 or 16, and Harry was about 18, Harry came out as lesbian to our parents. Both of our parents agreed to kick her out of the house because of this. At the time I knew I was gay, but I never mentioned this to them. Harry soon turned to alcohol to escape her pain from being disowned and was still that way when I left for Afghanistan. So as a defense I shut down any allegations of me possibly not being anything but straight.” John concludes his story and then says, “So, I’m ready for a relationship with you, I have never been more confident of something in my entire life. Sherlock? What of our relationship, what are your thoughts?”

“What does this make of our relationship status? Will we just be friends, will we try for more? Who would we tell? How would they react? How would the press react? What of Scotland Yard? What about Mycroft? What about your family?” Sherlock said starting to ramble. Very few people knew this, but Sherlock suffers from anxiety [authors note on this at the end] which lead to his drug addiction to stop the feelings produced by it. John was fortunately one of the few and noticed Sherlocks rambling and stopped him before he blew things out of proportion.

“Sherlock, we don’t need to figure this all out now, we have the rest of our lives, but in this this moment I would love to be your boyfriend.” John who had been waiting for a long time to say those words, sighed and looked to his now boyfriend to respond.

Sherlock’s P.O.V.

Sherlock knew exactly what he wanted to do with his new boyfriend… he wanted to sit on the couch together and just watch crap telly for hours. And most people would find this juvenile and silly, but Sherlock has never had a real relationship before and would love to do what all the couples in movies do (all the movies he has seen have been for cases of course).

“John, I wish to sit on the couch and watch crap telly with my boyfriend.” Sherlock of course felt lots of pride in calling John his boyfriend for the first time. John seem to not resent the idea, so Sherlock stood up from his chair in the kitchen and walked with John and they sat down together on the couch.

They sat close and just watched murder mysteries for hours (which Sherlock found hilarious due to the many inconsistencies he found the in show). After about two hours Sherlock realizes that John has fallen asleep on him. Saving this moment in his mind palace, Sherlock sits and enjoys the feeling of contempt he if feeling. Not wanting to waste this moment Sherlock sat perfectly still, because he knew he would eventually have to wake John up to have tea again, a Watson without tea is a scary sight.

 

Non-canon extra scene

Mrs. Hudson walked up the stairs to 221B to give her boys some tea for the morning, when she saw them sitting on the couch asleep. Now this was not an unusual sight, but today they were curled up around each other in a very intimate fashion.

Quickly running back down the stairs, she grabbed the phone and called the Detective Inspector at Scotland Yard.

Ten minutes later Greg Lestrade and Mrs. Hudson were discussing the new information and evidence for the very popular Johnlock over a photo taken not five minutes earlier.

 

 

Authors note: Sherlock has General Anxiety Disorder (GAD), and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). These are the mental health issues Sherlock struggles with, that John is aware of. Myself I deal with anxiety (GAD), have OCD tendencies which stem from my anxiety. I am currently dealing with an eating disorder and because of it I deal with lots of self-doubt, which my Sherlock will deal with too, and John will help him deal with. I do not want to project my life onto my story, but I will use my experiences to help form the story. For John’s perspective on helping Sherlock I will ask my sister and my wonderful boyfriend who have been supporting me through this. For these reasons I need a beta and that’s why I haven’t been updating, but I will start back ASAP.


	4. "I wish to tell Mrs.Hudson"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, hope you like it, I now have the plot planned out till chapter 45.
> 
> Hehe still fixing all my mistakes, a beta would sure make it helpful.  
> Fixing on:1-10-19

John’s P.O.V.

Despite not having sex or any action along those lines besides kissing and cuddling, Sherlock and John had to be careful of not being walked in on by Mrs.Hudson. Despite being about two weeks into their relationship, the couple had yet to tell anyone of their relationship. John who was tired of dancing around Mrs.Hudson’s mothering and cleaning decided he wanted to tell her of their relationship. Knowing he couldn’t just tell her on his own John approached Sherlock with his idea.

He went downstairs from his bedroom to the sitting room, where he found Sherlock sitting in his black chair deep in his mind palace. Walking over to Sherlock, John kissed him lightly on the forehead, successfully drawing him out of his mind palace. “Oh, hello John, when did you get down here?” Sherlock said once he was out of his mind palace.

John sat down across from Sherlock in his chair. “Love, I know we agreed to not tell anyone about our relationship just yet, but I wish to tell Mrs.Hudson about it. I don’t like trying to avoid her and she deserves to know, she is like a mother to both of us and she clearly wants us to be together, so we should tell her.” John confessed. “John, I know that you tend to be sentimental about certain subjects, but I have decided that I will too be sentimental and tell Mrs.Hudson.” Sherlock replied. Continuing he said to John “So, when and how shall we tell our dear Landlady?” John who knew that Sherlock had just made a big decision decided to sit quietly, while Sherlock thought over his actions. After a few minutes of silence John says “We should make dinner together and invite her and talk to her about our relationship after we eat.”

Sherlock’s P.O.V.

Sherlock loved cooking with John, they had cooked a few times in the past two weeks and he found it very pleasing and likes the idea, but knows this means he will have to eat at dinner. “John, if I have to eat at dinner, then I will, but you shall not force me to eat any time before that today.” Despite being only 9:00 in the morning John said “Fine Sherlock, but this is not an excuse to not eat tomorrow. I think we should make fettuccine alfredo, you like it and it is fairly easy, and I think we have the ingredients.”

Sherlock loved to make that dish and decided that was a very good idea. “I shall go down stairs and tell Mrs.Hudson, and you can start cleaning up your experiments, so we have a place to eat tonight.” John declared. Sighing Sherlock walked to the kitchen to clean up his beloved experiments. Sherlock loved all of his microorganisms, severed heads and poisons, but he knew if he did not clean them up John would be very mad at him for leaving dangerous objects around the food. Carefully Sherlock picked up his sides and placed them back in the box so they would be safe with the rest of his microorganisms. After all of the glass slides were moved to safe keeping in his room in a box at the bottom of his closet clearly labeled as slides along with his microscope.

Moving back into the kitchen Sherlock took all of his poisonous items and saved all of the data in his mind palace for later use and put all items in boxes to keep the poisons inside them and placed them carefully in the cabinet that he and John had set aside for all things non-consumable.

Once he was done with his poisons he put on some gloves and wrapped his severed head in plastic wrap as to preserve it, because it’s kind of awkward when a cabbie pulls up and he is caring a head. At some point John had come back up stairs and had moved all of the newspapers to the table in the sitting room.

Now that he was done cleaning he looked to John who was sitting in his chair looking through their very small and only cookbook for the recipe. “Sherlock it looks like we have all the ingredients, we have a few hours until we have to start cooking, what would you like to do?” Sherlock replied “Why don’t we look through the newspapers and see if there are any interesting cases, and if not we can watch some murder mysteries for fun.”

*time skip cuz I’m lazy*

John and Sherlock ended up finding a small case while looking through the papers and solved it in their flat and texted Lestrade their findings. After the case was over both men sat on the couch and watched their murder mysteries in peace cuddled up close knowing Mrs.Hudson would leave them alone because of the dinner tonight.

“John to achieve optimal amounts of time for cooking tonight's dinner we need to start cooking within the next ten minutes.” Sherlock had calculated their average cooking time in with preparing and serving time (plus a few minutes extra if they got a little carried away while kissing). Giving them about 50 minutes in total to have dinner on the table. “Ok Sherlock, you get out the noodles and start to cook them while I will start the sauce and pull out the chicken.”

Both men stood up from the couch and walked to the kitchen prepared to make the best dinner possible for their Landlady. Sherlock grabbed the noodles from the top shelf (which is why he does the noodles) and pulled out a pot and filled it with water and a little salt. After putting the noodles on Sherlock moved to help John by pulling the three breasts chicken out of the fridge and cutting them into small chunks and placing them into a smaller pot of boiling water that John had placed on the stove earlier.

Once that was done Sherlock had to just wait till the noodles cooked, so he walked up behind John and hugged him, wrapping his arms around John’s stomach and placing them in front of John while placing small kisses into John’s neck. “Sherlock, that feels good, but I’m cooking dinner and I don’t want to mess up the sauce.” John said softly as to hide how much he really did like Sherlock’s body pressed up against his. “Fine, but I shall still help you cook, I will stand right here” Sherlock said while referencing the place right beside John.

Sherlock stood right next to John holding his left hand while stirring the pasta and making sure he doesn't overcook the chicken while John added all the ingredients to the sauce and stirred it slowly. Reluctantly Sherlock let go of John’s hand to drain the pasta and serve it onto three dishes equally. After he finished with the noodles, Sherlock drained the chicken and waited on John to finish with the sauce.

John soon thereafter had dished out the sauce and Sherlock had placed the chicken on top. Quickly the boys set the table and made glasses of water for everyone. Once the table looked perfect Sherlock grabbed John’s hands and pressed their foreheads together and whispered “After dinner we will tell her. I love you.” Sherlock then kissed John on the lips in attempt to calm his nerves (which it did). John then replied to Sherlock “Love you too” in a very soft voice. As the couple separated and sat down across from each other at their table they heard the fateful “Whoo hoo” of Mrs.Hudson.

Mrs.Hudson’s P.O.V.

Mrs.Hudson was surprised by the tidiness of 221B, but she was proud at her boys effort. “John, Sherlock thank you for inviting me over for dinner, it is a nice surprise, we should do this more often” “It’s our pleasure Mrs.Hudson, and this is way overdue, we owe you for all that you have done.” John replied.

*time skip*

Dinner passed quickly with lots of small talk and Sherlock actually eating for once. Mrs.Hudson was about to see herself out as the boys insisted that they would clean up from dinner when Sherlock said “Mrs.Hudson there is something we need to talk to you about.” Martha Louise Hudson (Authors note: I checked this is her real name) in all of her years of watching out for her boys never expected to actually admit what this, sure she wanted them to be together and happy and sure she dropped hints,but she knew that they were not actually together. As she watched the scene unfold she saw John grab Sherlock’s hand comfortingly and nod to him. “Mrs.Hudson, John and I are together and in a romantic relationship and have been for two weeks. We thought you should know.” Mrs.Hudson laughed and smiled so happily and replied “Oh, boys I knew you loved each other, congratulations!”


End file.
